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Week 13 NFL Picks

The Seahawks took charge of the NFC Wildcard race in Week 12. Also, Kareem Hunt’s screw up has sent ripples throughout the league. (Photo by Bettina Hansen / The Seattle Times)

I won’t lie, I mailed it in this week. Not that you care. These picks are always garbage anyway.

Last Week: 7 – 8 – 0
Season:     93 – 66 – 2

Thursday Recap

Saints 10 at Cowboys 13
That was an impressive performance by the Cowboys defense. It was an equally awful performance by Drew Brees. With Kareem Hunt now gone, Brees’ performance opened the door wide open for Patrick Mahomes to take back the MVP award. Before we go, congrats to all you Dallas fans out there. Committing long-term money to Dak Prescott and Amari Cooper shouldn’t be a problem at all.

Early Games (1:00PM ET)

Ravens at Falcons
I know it’s only been two games, but I wouldn’t feel great about Lamar Jackson as my franchise quarterback. I’m going to keep picking the Falcons even though it never works out for me. FALCONS If I were Charles Barkley; Falcons -2.5

Broncos at Bengals
Denver’s remaining schedule is pretty much a cupcake and they have a similar makeup to the surging Dallas Cowboys (good defense, dominant ground game). Only problem for Denver is they already lost to Baltimore, and Vance Joseph’s conservative approach two weeks ago against the Chargers will probably haunt their playoff chances a month from now. BRONCOS If I were Charles Barkley; Bengals +5.5

Rams at Lions
With the Saints falling all over themselves on Thursday, the Rams are primed to win the top seed. The trick for Los Angeles will be to not look ahead to next week’s showdown with the Bears. RAMS If I were Charles Barkley; Lions +10.5

Cardinals at Packers
Aaron Jones is the answer to all Green Bay’s problems. He’s been the answer all along and yet they continue to forget about him. The 2nd half in Seattle? No Jones. Last week against Minnesota? Not enough Jones. Be Smart, Packers. PACKERS If I were Charles Barkley; Packers -14

Bills at Dolphins
One day the AFC East will be interesting again. Until then, remember Buffalo is the true godfather of today’s NFL offenses. DOLPHINS If I were Charles Barkley; Dolphins -3.5

Bears at Giants
I’m no expert. In fact, I’m the opposite of an expert. I’m wrong more than I’m right. I just write this blog for my own entertainment and the entertainment of 4-5 other humans. Anyway, it’s my opinion that Chicago has five weeks to figure out its running game or they’ll be one and down in the playoffs. BEARS If I were Charles Barkley; Giants +3.5

Panthers at Buccaneers
I don’t get the Panthers. When I figure them out I’ll let you know. PANTHERS If I were Charles Barkley; Panthers -3.5

Colts at Jaguars
Jason Whitlock called Dak Prescott “Black Bortles.” I think this is the most accurate assessment of Prescott to date. COLTS If I were Charles Barkley; Colts -5

Browns at Texans
The Browns are good and the Texans are overdue for a loss. Eight in a row for Bill O’Brien is excessive. Let’s look at this from an entertainment perspective… If the Browns win and the Colts win, next week’s Indy/Houston game would be an exciting, meaningful AFC South showdown in December! What is going on in the world?!?! BROWNS If I were Charles Barkley; Browns +6

Afternoon Games (4:05PM ET)

Jets at Titans
I know taking a QB at the top of the draft is the most likely method to find a franchise quarterback, but that method still misses more than it hits. Take 2015 as an example. Jameis Winston is fighting for his job in Tampa Bay and Marcus Mariota only flashes “stardom” one or twice a season. TITANS If I were Charles Barkley; Titans -9.5

Chiefs at Raiders
I’m not ready to discuss the Kareem Hunt situation. I’m still processing. CHIEFS If I were Charles Barkley; Raiders +14.5

Vikings at Patriots
Please understand I’m not making light of the Kareem Hunt incident, but goodness gracious the Patriots just keep winning even when they’re not playing. The most lethal team in the conference just lost their best weapon against New England. Hunt’s stats in two games against the Patriots; 228 rushing yards, 203 receiving yards, 4 touchdowns. PATRIOTS If I were Charles Barkley; Vikings +5.5

49ers at Seahawks
Russell Wilson is probably the most underrated player in the NFL. I know Richard Sherman and the rest of the glory day Seattle defense hate his guts, but Wilson is unbelievable. He’s doing more with less while Aaron Rodgers is doing less with more. Please reference the below tweet in support of my opinion. SEAHAWKS If I were Charles Barkley; Seahawks -10

Sunday Night (8:20PM ET)

Chargers at Steelers
Kareem Hunt’s departure sent ripples throughout the AFC. Pittsburgh has to be thinking it can now get into a first round bye. Los Angeles has to be thinking it can take the division and a first round bye as well. When blood is in the water the sharks will come. Kudos to the NFL for putting these sharks in primetime. CHARGERS If I were Charles Barkley; Chargers +3

Monday Night (8:15PM ET)

Redskins at Eagles
I have no idea what to expect from the Eagles Monday night. Everything points to them going into Dallas next week with the division lead on the line, but the Eagles have exceled at disappointing this season. Also, Dallas winning Thursday night all but guaranteed the Eagles will miss the playoffs unless they can manage at least a 4-1 close to the season. EAGLES If I were Charles Barkley; Eagles -6

*****

If I were Charles Barkley;
Last Week: 5 – 10 – 0
Season:   82 – 87 – 6

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